All of that would have been really moving, I'm sure, if she hadn't been so completely misinterpreting the issue. I guess it still was, that she bothered to say all that to my face, but more than anything, I just felt fucking frustrated.

"Sarah," I sighed, and scrubbed both hands over my face. Fine, if she wanted to play at being blunt, I could do that. It was like second nature. "I'm not standing here all torn up, crying on the inside because I don't know how to let people in. I'm not pushing you away because I'm afraid to be vulnerable, or whatever Lifetime movie bullshit you've conjured up in your head. I'm pushing you away because I am a dude, I have a dick, I will want to fuck you with it, and putting my sperm in anybody is a really bad idea. Okay? It's got nothing to do with feelings or not being held enough as a kid or whatever the fuck. It's pragmatism."

I pointed at her. "And now that you know, you can go form a club with Sookie, who did the same fucking thing you're doing now, which was the same fucking thing George did to me back home. I don't like it but I can't help it, and it's just the way it is."